Do you want to be a good person?
If yes, you’re not alone. Many of us care about being a good person. And being seen as one. But even though we attempt to do the right thing as often as we can, it doesn’t always work out the way we want it to.
No matter how hard we try, we’re not perfect. We all make mistakes. And that’s okay!
So, instead of pretending to be a good person, it’s essential to learn from your mistakes and strive to become a better person.
I hope that this post will help you with that. Below, I have listed 6 ways in which you can become a better person in everyday life.
Don’t assume that “this is just the way you are”
In order to become a better person, you need to accept that you have flaws. And that you can work on them!
If you don’t like certain traits of your personality, it’s wrong to assume that there’s nothing you can do. Don’t simply tell people that they have to accept you the way you are.
Instead, acknowledge these flaws and think about ways in which you could become a better person.
Granted, it’s hard to become a better person overnight. But the simple act of acknowledging that you have things to work on can make a huge difference in the way both ourselves and other people perceive us.
You wouldn’t want to be around a selfish person who tells you that it’s just something you have to deal with. And yet, you might be willing to stick around if they sincerely try to improve.
We all know the saying “you are perfect the way you are”. To that, I’d add that you’re perfect as long as you continue to grow as a person.
Stop judging other people for the choices they make
We know that each of us is different. We tend to agree, in theory, that the choices we make might not be right for other people. And yet, we are so quick to judge others for their decisions.
But why would we criticise someone for making choices that would be wrong for us? After all, it’s their life. And it’s safe to assume they we don’t know everything about them.
Just because someone doesn’t strive to find a stable job, it doesn’t mean that they’re doing it wrong. If someone decides not to go to university, it doesn’t say that they’re throwing their future away.
Everyone makes choices that seem to make sense from their point of view. And those choices might be wrong, sure. But they might also be the best thing they’ve ever done.
So, let others follow their dreams. Live their lives. And don’t judge them for it! It’s such a simple step, but it’ll help you become a better person – and a better friend.
Don’t gossip: it’s the easiest way to become a better person
If you’re striving to become a better person, stop gossiping. But (in my opinion) this doesn’t mean that you can’t ever talk about other people.
Talking about other people is my favourite thing in conversations. Mostly because I quickly get uncomfortable talking about myself. But it’s not necessarily a bad thing!
Before you disagree, let me explain:
You can talk about your friend who’s trying to become a professional musician in different ways:
“I have this friend who’s like 35 and still tries to make it as a musician. I’m wondering when he’ll ever realise that he needs to find a normal job.”
or
“I have a friend who’s working really hard on his musical career. He’s super talented, but it’s been very difficult for him to find a job. I just hope that he’ll get a chance to prove himself soon.”
See the difference?
The first option is judgmental. And not something you would say directly to that friend’s face. The second sentence looks totally fine to me.
By not gossiping or judging other people behind their backs, you’ll automatically become a better person.
Personally, I’ve noticed that I’m naturally pretty quick to gossip, so I pay really close attention to not say negative things about others. I’m certainly not perfect, but I really try!
Don’t try to prove that you’re right all the time
In some situations, you will need to prove that you’re right. For example, if someone tries to convince you that putting a plastic bag on their head is a good idea and you try to save their life. But most of the time, we argue about things that aren’t as important.
Instead of trying to prove that you’re smarter or better in any way, just try to be a good friend instead. (Being a good friend will make you a better person, too!)
My boyfriend and I often have lively discussions about completely random stuff. Historical events, scientific facts, etc. A lot of the time, we try to convince one another that we’re right. Sometimes to the point where the discussion starts resembling an argument.
Over the years, I had to learn to take a step back when an unimportant topic starts affecting our relationship. In the grand scheme of things, I don’t care about being right. I care about my boyfriend.
So, the next time you feel like you need to prove something, stop yourself for a minute. Do you really? And if not, is there a way to just let it go?
Learn to listen
Once in a while, we’re probably all guilty of thinking or talking about ourselves too much.
Sometimes, even when we’re supposedly listening to someone, we don’t really listen. I’ve mentioned this before and it’s still something I’m constantly working on.
When you’re listening to someone, you shouldn’t prepare your next response. You should certainly not think about your grocery list for tonight. Instead, focus on the person who’s talking to you. Even if it’s not always easy.
Try actually listening to people instead of getting distracted. This alone will help you become a better person!
Stop living on autopilot
A great way to become a better person is to notice your surroundings more. A lot of the time, we don’t even realise that we’re acting in a way that doesn’t make us a good person.
When I still lived in Paris, the following happened to me so many times: I was sitting on the subway, not paying attention to anything, and suddenly I saw an old lady standing next to me. And I didn’t even offer her a seat. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I never noticed that she was there.
Even if you don’t live in a big city, paying more attention to your surroundings can make you a better person. Whether it’s about noticing that your co-worker is going through something or that someone at the supermarket needs help reaching the highest shelf – there’s always someone who might appreciate your help.
Learn from your mistakes instead of justifying them
Sometimes, we make mistakes that hurt other people. Even if we don’t mean to.
But once you realise that you made a mistake, you should acknowledge it and not come up with excuses. It doesn’t matter that you’re tired, or the other person wasn’t clear. If you’ve done something wrong, try to learn from it and be better next time.
Instead of focusing so hard on proving that you are a good person, give yourself space to actually do the right thing. And become a better person in the process!
What do you think? Are there any aspects of your personality that you’re working on to become a better person?
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Letting go instead of getting in an argument with someone who has a different opinion is something I’m trying to work on. I realized that often we tend to see our opinion as the only truth, and we forget that other people have their own truths so for them our perspective doesn’t make sense, no matter how much we try to explain it.
I found I’m much calmer when I just let go of the need to prove that I’m right.
Yes, me too! Being right is just not the most important thing in the world. Letting go of that and focusing on respecting other’s opinions is so much more valuable, even if it’s not something that we naturally tend to do.